mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Randomize
