I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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