party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
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