I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Randomize
