Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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