Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
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