How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
