Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Your mouth is God's brothel.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
