Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
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