Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
