woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
This show inspires me to have sex in space
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Randomize
