if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
there is glitter all over my balls
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
