I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
