he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
