Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
