I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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