isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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