It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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