you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
