glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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