His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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