Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
