The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
