I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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