only if we run a train.
done.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
