i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
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