He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
