my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Holy shit dude........stairs
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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