Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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