I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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