I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Randomize
