It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
