it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
