it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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