I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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