question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
