Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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