tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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