Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
