fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I look better un-naked...
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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