Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
