He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Even my vagina gasped.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
