whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
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