I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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