pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
