I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
When did angry sex become our thing?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
