i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
