Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
