I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
