I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
