Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Randomize
